Adeleke Rachel Tioluwani: How young Nigerian writer committed suicide after predicting her death in moving poem

Okay.

I am Solomon
And I’ve brought my own songs to your ears
But mines are Lamentations
Those I’ve always kept away like hallucinations

Maybe, I have tried too many times
To be not pen who writes as victim,
One that always deploy sadness as routine
Maybe, this girl has tried too many times
To be not one always appearing saddened
To be not one always writing as a victim

Please, scream to my ears
That I have tried enough
That I have fought enough
That I have feigned strong too long
That I have feigned happy too much

Of course, this is not a poem
But words as tears from a broken hard girl
From one whose heart is filled with tears that never dry
Tears that are never cried and songs that are never sung

Of course, this is not a poem
But scars from a ripped young girl
These words are the marks of arrows that have pierced a million times
They are tears of a broken hard girl

I know you will read them
So, this will be as shortly long as it can flow

Depression has visited me
It brought suicide with it
But I found my tongue and sucked its clit
I watched suicide gets horny at my film
Now, I think I have feigned too strong and happy enough
Now, I think I have kept too many tears that are never cried
And too many songs that are never sung

I have questioned life and it brought suicide
But I found suicide as the angel in disguise
Who has come with hands to be fine
With piercing fingers, claws that bewitch
Suicide is a witch with finesse
Reason I died so many times in distress
Yet, lost no life

I have questioned life and it brought hardship
It displayed to me how I’m so fortunate
To live and be groomed with architects of misfortunes—
Hands that will never add to you and will never let you go to grow
Life said this twenty year old is too old to have a minute sweetness
All along, it keeps bringing sweet mess

So, today as I write in tears
This is not a poem but songs of Solomon’s daughter
Lamentations that come as hallucinations

Scream into my ears
That I have had enough
Let me hear
That I haven’t heard enough

Tell me strength that fails me is just being considerate
That pretense that now left is just being considerate
That I have had too much

Scream into my ears
And tell me I’m not gonna be fine anymore
Shout to my heart
That this fighting is enough

Please, tell me to break down
And never rise again

That my fate in faith has played enough

Tell me to break down
And never rise again

For even these legs are tired of strength that ain’t true
My little body has gotten fed up of scaling through

Scream into my ears
And tell me I’ve had enough

Scream into my ears
And tell me I’ve not heard enough