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Why rape victims don’t talk (Opinion)
By Femi Salawu
Victims of rape react differently in different cultures. In developed nations, women and children are protected by very strong laws that punish offenders harshly. Any accused is presumed guilty except proven innocent. Even if the sexual abuse offender is their President or any other powerful person, such person will be made to face the law.
It’s the other way round in developing countries. Sadly, an accuser is presumed guilty and is made to present evidence. Such evidence will be treated with disdain sef. This is irrespective of the whether the person is a minor or an adult. Now, it gets worse when the accused is a religious person who is deemed ‘Holy’ by faithfuls most of whom are fanatical.
All these reasons enumerated above are some of the reasons victims of sex abuse keep mute. By default, the first response of victims of abuse in developing countries is actually no response: mute. Most of them die with their pains and are constantly tormented by their abuser. UNICEF says 1 out 4 girls in Nigeria have experienced abuse before 18. For boys, it is 1 out 10. This stat is troubling.
Just to add, there are several levels to the damage victims go through. The abuse have repercussions: it’s not just physical rape but also psychological and emotional. In a developing society like ours where there is no rehabilitation, victims become damaged and miserable from bottled/ raging emotions for the rest of their lives. They continue their lives like a living corpse: they carry an open wound.
How to know rape victims: for parents, you should be very afraid whenever your kids begin to withdraw, keep mute and act strangely. In adults, other manifestations include mood swings, depression, suicidal thoughts etc These are some of the irrational traits exhibited by victims.
We need to have a change of heart towards victims of sexual abuse. The narrative needs to change. And it begins with you. Yes, you!